Clarification and justification of Episode 18 and 19:
Ling'er's troubles and the situation.

Ling'er's love for Xiao Yao was never questionable anywhere in the series, neither was it for Xiao Yao and his love for her. We as the audience watching know that Ling'er wanted the best for him, because his happiness means everything to her. Ling'er went through so much during their separation (she even attempted to kill herself), she realised her true identity as a half human half snake (descendant of Nu Wa), and her role as The Princess of Nan Zhao Guo.

She is often misunderstood by the other characters such as Xiao Yao and Yue Ru, who see her as simply acting strange and 'different' totally unaware of the pain she suffered. During the separation, she saw that Yue Ru had feelings for him and the two seem to get along well despite the bickering, she felt a burden to him. Her duty and role to protect her people are a large part of her responsibility, and she felt she couldn't give Xiao Yao true happiness. After long consideration, Ling'er reluctantly tells Xiao Yao she wants to break up. Xiao Yao being frustrated and confused refuses to accept such thing when she didn't give him a proper reason. Ling'er starts to act like she doesn't love him anymore, and often hangs around with Tang Yu or Jin Yuan. Xiao Yao doesn't want it to look like it bothers him, and he and Yue Ru pretend to be having fun. Now the question is, why doesn't Ling'er just leave him, considering they have broken up but continues to be around where Xiao Yao was (all staying at the same Inn)?

The reason is because you can't stop loving someone just because you want to, nor can you forget the one you deeply love, overnight. You can't only blame Ling'er either, because it was obvious Xiao Yao wanted her to stay (and was happy when she did), even though she said to break up~ he wanted to be with her, no matter how much she tried to hurt him. He knew she still loved him, and he will always love her. Ling'er on the other hand feels the need to leave him, but her heart doesn't want to separate; what she needs to do what what she wants to do, clash.

That's why both Ling'er and Xiao Yao don't want to leave each other, and comes up with excuses to stay together at the Inn as long as possible, even if it was one more day. Once one of them suggests to stay for a particular reason (an excuse), the other lightens up and automatically approves of the idea to stay longer as well. Those episodes were to show the difficulty of the two deciding to officially separate~ it was hard for both of them. It was also to show the extent to which characters had to go in order for the other to give up.

She tried to make it look like she didn't love him anymore, shown in her cold actions towards him, and lack of care whomever he was with (which in this case was Yue Ru). Ling'er is then seen as deliberately hurtful and this usually gives a reason for Yue Ru supporters to say, 'Ling'er is undeserving of Xiao Yao since she pushes him away and Yue Ru is always so caring'. Now, let's hold it for a second, and take a few steps back. Xiao Yao trusted Ling'er she didn't mean to hurt him, and that she still loved him all along despite what she may do. She must have her reasons. Yue Ru on the other hand couldn't see this at all, and she assumes Ling'er doesn't love him and even tells her off, and that she will be the one to heal his heart. Yes, we can't blame Yue Ru since she didn't know what Ling'er was really thinking, but we as the audience do. We know that every action hurted Ling'er just as much as it did for Xiao Yao. The two of them tried to hide it, and always smiled to show the other one they weren't hurt. What do we see? The truth below the surface, both of them were crying in their rooms each night. Why they cry so much? Proof they love each other so deeply. As the saying goes, the one you love hurts you the most.

So then, why is it that even though the audience knows the truth, some still blame Ling'er? There's no reason to hate or dislike Ling'er, especially knowing what was going on, that's unbelievable. Yue Ru supporters just want to take this opportunity to "bash" Ling'er's character so it seems like Yue Ru is the better one for Xiao Yao. Of course, everyone is entitled to have their opinion on who they want Xiao Yao to be with, but using this as an excuse that Ling'er is not good with him is lacking strength in the argument.

True, she hurt him pretty bad, and yet he still loves her...what does that prove? It just shows how much stronger their love was (incase anyone had doubts) and their feelings for each other are so much more than anything else. We don't see Xiaoyao and Yue Ru's relationship ANYWHERE near as strong as theirs.

Some argue that Ling'er doesn't know she's hurting him. It's killing him as much as it is to her. She'd rather him be hurt now than to be killed with her in battle. She doesn't want him to suffer even more in the future- she's looking at the big picture. To push a loved one to another girl is extremely difficult, but that's what she tried to do.

This makes it even more the clearer why Xiao Yao doesn't really love Yue Ru~ even at this point of time, hasn't regained memories of the past, and yet is THIS devoted to Ling'er- he had no obligations to love her or the responsibility, he doesnt know they were married. Time and time again, no matter how much Yue Ru did for him, he never saw her the same as Ling'er, not even close. Even when Ling'er hinted to him on many ocassions that there was someone like Yue Ru who cared a lot for him, he didnt even consider Yue Ru. Look what happens in the Inn when Yue Ru pretends to be loveydovy with Xiao Yao, it made him sick. When Yue Ru confesses her love to him, he didn't even have much reactions and replied "I'm not #7".

After all the trouble Ling'er tried to make Xiao Yao stop loving her, she finally realised it wasn't working since he still loved her and always will. Xiao Yao decided to breakup~ because he didnt want to make it hard for her. He knows she must have her reasons and wishes her all the best. Look at all the trust they share~ even after all that, Xiao Yao knows Ling'er is doing it for a reason other than to simply hurt him. The two finally reach a compromise and enjoy each other's company for the last time, a time when they get to see red dandelions again.

After they broke up and when YueRu confesses her love to him, he felt obligated just because she was always around helping him and crying for him. It seemed more or less like he owed her attention and love; so he did that. And yet, even the times when he was with Yue Ru he was dreaming of Ling'er... When she died, there was the sword fighting scene between the two, but nothing more. Why? It wasn't nearly as deep as he felt for the Ling'er, who at that point was still alive and whom he should devote his time to from then onwards til the end.